As much as HR likes to view ourselves as the caped crusaders swooping in to save the day, our damsels in distress do not always swoon over us.
The truth is HR professionals are human. We do our best but face regular run-ins with kryptonite.
The solution? Face the realities of the modern workplace and understand what it is like to be an employee outside of the storied HR-cave. Step off your own cape.
Realities That Feel Like Catch 22’s
Talent Acquisition
You appear more employable when you are employed.
You have to appear interested in a role you know little about but not so interested that you appear phony or desperate.
Calling an interview an informal chat or “get to know” is only true for the interviewer. Please don’t pretend.
Ghosts never say “boo” even though that would take the pressure off.
Performance Management
Nothing in an end-of-year review should be a surprise, but without a surprise, it feels like a pencil whipping time suck.
Feedback sandwiches still contain knuckles.
Goals run small so bonuses can run big.
Succession plans are fictional until a dragon crosses your moat, your senior guards are MIA and everything is heating up around you.
Talent Development
We don’t have time to learn, but if we don’t learn, we won’t be in business ten years from now.
We can’t afford L&D but we can afford to buy the skills at a premium through talent acquisition.
Not another eLearning?! Oh wait, you actually want me to participate in live webinars?
My leader should take this course. Oh really, they thought you should. Coffee break anyone? The pot is calling the kettle.
Engagement & Culture
We don’t want beer and pizza…but really, we do.
Culture can’t be defined until you paste values up as wallpaper.
Targeted diversity programs often exclude rather than include.
Wanna know what I think? Ask, so that I cannot reply to the survey.
To the Point
HR is both art and science. We must remember who goes to the museum and needs the medicine.
Catch 21 or bust.
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